Monday, May 9, 2011

Sensation: The Great Art To Life.

I love my Mamma!

Well, as you all know, yesterday was Mother's Day. Chris and I spent some wonderful time with both of our families over the weekend (mine on Saturday, his on Sunday.) I was especially thankful for my mom this year. Having been pregnant, and I have a whole new appreciation for what she went through to have children. I also look at the bond I have with her in a new light. I think about how madly in love I fell with my baby in just 13 weeks...how much stronger is her love for me after 25 years? My mom found out she was pregnant with me exactly 30 days after miscarrying her first baby at 13 weeks. I can't help but think about what a miracle it will be when I get pregnant again, how elated Chris and I will be, how precious and how wanted that new baby will be...I was that miracle to my mom and dad. I was the one my mom wanted and needed so badly after losing her first baby. I miss our baby so bad, but I am anxious to meet the baby (or babies) that we are supposed to bring home.

I won't pretend like yesterday was not a difficult day for me. I cried. A lot. I had so many waves of emotions that I just was not prepared for (especially after coming home to flowers and a Mother's Day card from Chris that morning. He is amazing.) I decided to let myself feel what I needed to, it is part of life and part of my healing. I was thankful for the people who acknowledged me, but not hurt by those who didn't. I know it is a confusing and awkward situation. That is why I chose to spend the weekend making sure the mothers in my life felt loved and special. This was their day to celebrate, and my day to remember in my heart. My time to celebrate will come...

3 comments:

  1. That's such an incredible story! Your time to celebrate will come, and when it does- it will be better than you could've ever imagined

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sarah, I thought of you yesterday. I really did. I wish I would have taken it one step further and called, texted, or emailed you. Just know that you were in my thoughts. Happy Belated Mother's day to you - it sounds like you had an emotional yet great weekend.

    I just love you. And I ain't just sayin' that. You are a wonderful friend. I look forward to getting together SOON.

    *I deleted and BLOCKED the said "guy". Way too awkward to remain "friends".

    ReplyDelete
  3. Happy Mother's Day Sarah :)
    I agree with your last post where you said my baby deserves to be mourned as much as a baby is celebrated. You were a mother the first time the baby is conceived. Andy and I are praying for your healing and your future blessings. Love ya!

    ReplyDelete